Sunday, September 30, 2012

Just give me the $10 000 already.

So for the past 3 weeks I've been listening to the radio station Hot 89.9 in the hopes of winning their $10 000 Hot Hit contest, where, if you are the 89th caller after they play Katy Perry's "Wide Awake" song you win the moneys. At first I thought this would be a fun way to pass the enormous amounts of time I spend on the bus, as well as potential earn some sweet cash, but...

Songs that I used to enjoy are really starting to annoy the living daylights out of me. I think when you hear the same song 10 times a day everyday for a week you start to over analyze the lyrics.

For example, Flo Rida featuring Sia "Wild One"

My bus rides have become more stressful, as there are apparently several "dead air" areas in this city:

So far they've run the contest twice, and both times I've failed in a big way. This contest has suddenly become a sign that the universe hates me:


Yes, I lost my bus pass. My $120 bus pass. It likely fell out of my pocket when I was rushing to get off the bus to call the radio station, so I'm choosing to blame them. Lucky for me someone was nice enough to turn it into the lost and found, and they saved me a ton of money!!


I was outside waiting for the bus, no where near another telephone, and my cell phone died. I had to turn the radio off because I couldn't handle someone else winning while my phone was dead. Sigh.

These near (okay not so near) misses at winning $10 000 have the same inevitable effect:

Sad walk.

Then comes the redeeming announcement "Don't worry hotties, we're rebooting the contest,

 so you have another chance to win $10 000!!"

Anyway, I don't think this emotional roller coaster is healthy, so I respectfully request that I just be given the $10 000. Seriously. That would be really nice of them.

Monday, September 17, 2012

TV, why do you lie to me so?

Posted by M

Have you seen that recent commercial for the newest sleeping drug? You know, the one where the mother gets incredibly excited that she actually slept through the night? She has a t-shirt and a flag? Yeah, that one. Clearly she has her print artist on speed dial.  I can just imagine me like that:

In case you are wondering, the song in my head is 1985's, "Nightshift" by the Commodores.
Look it up, you'll thank me.

Well, I've seen this ad several times, and it just makes me mad. I mean, I can't even IMAGINE waking up having slept through the night, let alone having enough energy in the morning to dance. Granted I clearly have a sleeping problem, but really?! A flag?? Jeepers. Either this pill is pure magic, or they are seriously overestimating its dance-causing capabilities. And drug companies, if this is an accurate depiction, I would like a truck-load please. Like, right now.

Let's get real, this is me in the morning:

Your eyes do not deceive you, that is in fact a t-shirt nightgown.

And that's after being in bed for nine hours! Yep, it's not pretty.

P.S. I have to admit, I did turn to my all time favourite advice website: ehow. They say, and I quote, "Get a good mattress". A second search wielded the results, "Is it better to put my laptop to hibernate or sleep". Yeah, thanks for nuthin'.