Wednesday, October 19, 2011

How to be picture perfect: Take it from Keira

Posted by M

Recently, while posing for a picture, I was reminded of my love of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. Random? Stick with me and I'll explain:
This is not only one of the best novels ever written (not just my opinion, it's a proven fact), but has brought fans hours of entertainment in the form of the 1995 A&E version starring Colin Firth (oh, and Jennifer Ehle...oooops). This epic 5-part mini-series is well worth the day it takes to watch it all. For many summers, some amazing friends and I would gather together to bond over the light-hearted story and ideal (yeah, he starts out jerky, but really he's just misunderstood!) man that is Mr. Darcy. There was nary a dry eye by the end.

Exhibit A:
Need I show more? Trust me, just watch it.

Anyway, I digress. What I really thought of while taking the photo was the 2005 Kiera Knightley version. During the 129 minutes of film, Kiera constantly displays what my friends and I came to call the "Keira Kiss". The Keira Kiss is the one, sure-fire way that you can always look AWESOME in pictures! Reunions, weddings, work functions, boy or name it, you will be the bomb.

Is she happy? Sad? Hungry? Who cares, she looks great!

So, how is this look achieved, you ask? First, focus on your lips. Imagine that you have been stung by a bee right on the kisser, or that you have recently received a significant collagen treatment (if you have then hoorah!, you're one step ahead of everyone!). You will feel your lips start to expand outward immediately. I'm doing it just thinking about it! Next, purse your lips just like you do while admiring your gorgeous self in the mirror (oh come on, we all know you do it). Hold that pose while everyone else yells "Cheese!" and you're golden!

Everyone will always admire your slick demeanor, and you will never again have to worry about having that goofy grin or half-smile plastered all over precious pictures. Voila, your answer to unphotogenic awkwardness for LIFE. To any celebrities out there: I'm available for photo consultation for a nominal fee. And when I say nominal, think "large".

She does it everywhere! LOVE it!

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